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Traditional wedding vows often include the promise to be by your spouse’s side "in sickness and in health, 'til death do you part." Or something similar. Well, if you are in a bad marriage, the death part may come sooner than expected.

A new study finds that a stressful marriage may be unhealthy, especially for men. In fact, for some people it may be as bad as smoking.

But other studies say marriage helps us live longer

This finding seems to be opposite of many other studies that say marriage improves health. For example, one British study found that being married improved a person’s chances of surviving a heart attack. The researchers said married people had shorter hospital stays.

And experts at Harvard Medical School write on their website that married people:

- live longer
- have fewer strokes and heart attacks
- have a lower chance of becoming depressed
- are less likely to have advanced cancer at the time of diagnosis
- and more likely to survive cancer for a longer period of time
- and survive a major operation more often.

The researchers also found that a bad marriage was harder on men’s health than on women’s.

A key to a good marriage is communication

A good marriage is not without arguments, stress and disagreements. What seems to matter most is how a couple speaks to each other. How do they handle their differences? How do they resolve an argument?

The act of getting married does not make people healthier. Instead, the support married people give each other can help them stay healthier, heal faster, and have better mental well-being.

Tips for keeping your relationship healthy

On the website Women’s Health, relationship experts and happy couples give their tips on how to keep a relationship healthy. Here are a few.

Stop keeping score. A healthy relationship is not about winning and losing. In the bigger picture, who made the most money or who emptied the dishwasher last is not important.

Touch more. It does not have to be sexual touching. Simply holding hands can create stronger feelings between people. But now that we’re on the subject, relationship experts claim that having s.ex more does help a couple stay close.

Accept your in-laws. No family is perfect. Experts warn against complaining about your partner’s family or trying to change them. Having a sense of humor is often the best approach.

Turn off social media, stop texting, hide your phone and just hang out. Turning off social media and technology gives a couple the space to just be themselves.

Playing a game, cooking a meal or taking a walk allows a couple to have simple fun together.

Learn how to fight fairly. Even couples in healthy relationships disagree. A relationship expert suggests that understanding how the other person deals with conflict can help a marriage in a big way.

And don’t be afraid of losing a fight. Remember the earlier tip about not keeping score.

I’m Anna Matteo.
And I’m Bryan Lynn.



Advancing the human rights of lesbian, gay, bisexual, transgender, and intersex (liên giới tính) [LGBTI] persons is a key part of the U.S. government’s broader advocacy in support of human rights and fundamental freedoms worldwide.

HILLARY CLINTON - U.S. Secretary of State

“This weekend, we will celebrate Human Rights Day, the anniversary of one of the great accomplishments of the last century. Beginning in 1947, delegates from six continents devoted themselves to drafting a declaration that would enshrine the fundamental rights and freedoms of people everywhere. In the aftermath of World War II, many nations pressed for a statement of this kind to help ensure that we would prevent future atrocities (hung bạo) and protect the inherent humanity and dignity of all people.”

“And so the delegates went to work. They discussed, they wrote, they revisited, revised, rewrote, for thousands of hours. And they incorporated suggestions and revisions from governments, organizations, and individuals around the world.”

U.S. President Barack Obama has committed to this effort during his administration, appointing the first ever Special Envoy for the Human Rights of LGBTI persons, Randy Berry, in 2015. Special Envoy Berry notes that the promotion of these rights internationally is based on the principles enshrined (trân quý/bảo vệ) in the United States’ constitution and the Universal Declaration of Human Rights:

RANDY BERRY - The State Department's First Special Envoy For Human Rights of LGBTI Persons

“All of our work in this field and in so many others in the human rights field at the State Department is really based on an understanding of what is the promise of equal protection under the law and what equality really means under our constitution … At the heart of what we’re always talking about is not an issue of special rights for this community or any other but really, just an issue of equal rights absent any discrimination based on markers of identity.”

Special Envoy Berry’s work has focused on helping communities to help themselves by strengthening key global partnerships that promote the human rights of LGBTI persons around the world.

BAN KI-MOON - The eighth Secretary-General of the United Nations

My promise to the lesbian, gay, bisexual and transgender members of the human family is this: I am with you. I promise that as Secretary-General of the United Nations, I will denounce attacks against you, and I will keep pressing leaders for progress.

I am committed to leading a global campaign in partnership with the United Nations human rights office. I count on others to join us.

Together, we can make the world safer, freer and more equal for everyone. Thank you.

One such partnership, the Equal Rights Coalition, was founded by Uruguay and the Netherlands and is now made up 33 states, including the U.S. The coalition provides a standing platform for governments to consolidate efforts in achieving human rights and enables like-minded governments to more effectively cooperate, share best practices, and discuss common challenges.

DANIEL BAER - Deputy Assistant Secretary, Bureau of Democracy, Human Rights, and Labor

“Hi, I’m Daniel Baer, a deputy assistant secretary in the Bureau of Democracy Human Rights and Labor here at the State Department and on behalf of Secretary Clinton and my colleagues here in Washington and at embassies and consulates around the world, I’m delighted to be able to wish everyone a Happy Pride (Tự Hào Đồng Tính).

“The first Pride celebration was held in New York over 40 years ago, and since then, in an ever-growing number of cities across the United States and around the world, Lesbian Gay Bisexual and Transgender people and their friends, families, and allies have come together to celebrate dignity, community, and equality.”

“From Cape Town to Beijing, from Mexico City to Sydney, from Lima to Talinn, this year’s Pride celebrations reflect local cultures and a universal message—that all people are entitled (trao quyền) to live with respect and dignity regardless of their sexual orientation (định hướng tính dục) or gender identity (nhân dạng giới), and regardless of where they live.”

“Discriminatory laws and practices on all continents continue to feed stigma and shame for LGBT people. Pride gatherings are an opportunity to reject that shame and the inequality that it suggests, and to assert in its place the legitimate entitlement of each person to enjoy universal human rights, and the equal place of each person in the human family.”


“Now, raising this issue, I know, is sensitive for many people and that the obstacles standing in the way of protecting the human rights of LGBT people rest on deeply held personal, political, cultural, and religious beliefs. So I come here before you with respect, understanding, and humility (khiêm tốn).”

“Today, I want to talk about the work we have left to do to protect one group of people whose human rights are still denied in too many parts of the world today. In many ways, they are an invisible minority. They are arrested, beaten, terrorized, even executed. Many are treated with contempt (khinh miệt) and violence by their fellow citizens while authorities empowered to protect them look the other way or, too often, even join in the abuse. They are denied opportunities to work and learn, driven from their homes and countries, and forced to suppress or deny who they are to protect themselves from harm.”

“I am talking about gay, lesbian, bisexual, and transgender people, human beings born free and given bestowed (trời ban) equality and dignity, who have a right to claim that, which is now one of the remaining human rights challenges of our time. I speak about this subject knowing that my own country's record on human rights for gay people is far from perfect. Until 2003, it was still a crime in parts of our country. Many LGBT Americans have endured violence and harassment in their own lives, and for some, including many young people, bullying and exclusion are daily experiences. So we, like all nations, have more work to do to protect human rights at home.”

The U.S. also supports the Global Equality Fund which joins more than 25 countries and private-sector entities:

“The Global Equality Fund, acting as a public-private partnership, has delivered in excess of $30 million in grants to civil society organizations in more than 50 countries around the world to really just get at the intersection of government and civil society and to just resource some very, very modest work of engagement, of visibility, of creative approaches to protecting the rights of this particular society.

The fund supports civil society actors such as the Sarajevo Open Center -- an organization that is helping the Bosnian government and Bosnian civil society to work together to implement a national action plan on LGBTI inclusion.

Special Envoy Randy Berry, “We’re seeing what is truly an organic change at a global level.”

Composed & Edited by Lê Quốc An
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