IELTS WRITING

Some children spend hours every day on their smartphones.
Why is this the case? Do you think this is a positive or negative development?

Give reasons for your answer and include any relevant examples from your own knowledge or experience.
Write at least 250 words.

(HELP ME EVALUATE MY ESSAY, THANK YOU GUYS)

These days, with the ubiquitousness of electronic devices, children spend more and more time using their smartphones. There are some feasible reasons to this case and I personally believe that this is a detrimental development.

To begin with, it is undeniable that children are getting more glued to their smartphones for some reasons. First, numerous intriguing games on smartphones have induced kids to allocate much time to play. The children cannot resist these games’ tremendous attraction, hence spend hours every day playing them. For instance, my 8-year-old cousin often devotes 9 to 10 hours per day to immerse himself in a favorite puzzle game on his father’s smartphone. Next, most parents nowadays are too snowed under to play with their sons and daughters, thus their children have no one to make friend with but their smartphones. It is obvious that these children occasionally splurge time playing games on smartphones while their parents are busy with work.

I, however, suppose that this trend is absolutely negative when children spend much time daily on their smartphones. Firstly, if the children keep allocating too much time on these electronic devices, they may be addictive to them, which can possibly distract them from their studying. On top of that, spending lots of time on smartphones can make children more prone to eyes-related problems such as short-sightedness and astigmatism. Some recently published research have shown that more and more children are short-sighted due to excessive time on the screens.

In conclusion, there are several reasons leading to children spending much time per day on their smartphones and I would argue that this is a harmful development.

(273 words)

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